Sunday, July 12, 2009

It's been a while....

I'm here. Alive and well. I've just been very quiet lately. There's been a lot going on in my life - but no, I did not have a miracle BFP, and I am not pregnant and therefore in hiding. (Sadly - I'm not one of those girls that everyone knows - you know the one people talk about "I know this girl, she tried for 8 years, had 3 losses, went through 5 IVFs, and just when she had given up, BAM, she was pregnant on her own!")

My life is average.

Remember my uncle in the east coast? The one I went to meet? He had been so sick for so many years, with each episode adding on to the previous one. The final event in March this year when his lungs collapsed was like the last straw on his back. He was on ventilator, and being fed through a tube, and with no hopes being given by any doctor that he would ever recover from it. It was really sad - his brain was alert and active, but his body would not cooperate. His muscles had atrophied over the years and he had been on a wheelchair for a few years. He wasn't able to do anything for himself anymore, and it was not getting better. He decided he had had enough. He requested the doctors to pull the plug a couple of weeks ago. They took him through several psychological and medical evaluations and then decided he was sane enough to be making the call he was.

My parents came from India, and were with my uncle when the ventilator was removed. The doctors had said it would take 2 - 3 hours after the ventilator was removed for his oxygen levels to be too low for him to survive.

But no - 3 hours went by, 5 hours went by, 12 hours went by and he was doing ok. We were all confused. Were we witnessing a medical miracle? The doctors were shocked, and they said they didn't know what to say any more. Finally it was 3 days after the ventilator was turned off that my uncle passed on. His family, my parents, my DH, and a couple more relatives were with my uncle in his final moments.

It's been a couple of weeks now. My parents are back in CA with us - they will stay for a little more time before they head back to India.

I've been busy trying to soak up every moment with my parents while they are here, and therefore have been inactive on the blogs. I'm sorry that I haven't been commenting much on your blogs, and I haven't been writing at all. I do try and read most of your posts, but sometimes am not able to sit and comment back. I will be back to being more regular soon, I promise!


Sky said...

Nikki, he was ready to go and for his sake, I am happy for him that his wish was fulfilled.

Hugs to you during this difficult time for you and your family.

Caroline said...

Hi Nikki,

It is so good to hear from you. You have been missed.

I am sorry to hear of your Uncle's passing. I hope that you have enjoyed some time with your parents, despite the difficult circumstances surrounding their visit.

Big hugs to you,


DAVs said...

Glad to hear you're ok. I'm so sorry about your uncle.
It's good to soak up all that family time with your parents--as I am continually reminded, family and friends are IT, precious and to be cherished, always.

I Believe in Miracles said...

I'm sorry to hear about your uncle. That's amazing that he lasted so long.

I hope you have a great time with your parents.

Still thinking about you and praying for you.


Jill M. said...

I'm so sorry for all you've been dealing with, but good to hear from you. Take your time, we'll all still be here when you return. Hugs

Shelby said...

I am so sorry to hear about your Uncle. I can only imagine how difficult this has been for you and your family. My thoughts are with you all.

It is great to hear though that your parents were able to be there and are now able to be with you. I hope you are able to get in some great quality time with them.

In the mean time, it's good to hear from you, but totally understandable why you have been MIA. You have a lot on your plate, but whenever you decide to drop in, you know we'll all be here waiting as always! **HUGS**

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear abt your uncle. May he rest in peace.
My thoughts are with you and your family.

I am glad that you are spending some time with parents. Take it easy and take care.

Clio said...

Nikki, don't even worry about keeping up with blogs right now. It was great that you found the time to give us an update on how you are doing. You have been in my thoughts lately. Sorry to hear about your uncle. It's so interesting that he chose to make that call and yet it took him so much longer than expected to depart. It must have been really touching to witness that. It takes courage to let go and allow oneself to be embraced by the unknown, your uncle is a very brave and decided soul.

Phoebe said...

I hear you about your life being average and no miracle pregnancies. I too am in the same boat.

So sorry about your uncle. It's so hard to see someone you love suffer. I hope he is at peace now.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear about your uncle.

Thinking of you and your family.

Lorraine said...

I am glad your uncle was able to make his own decision about his outcome, even though it must have been terribly hard for the rest of the family. But it is a gift to be given the chance to be in control of your own fate, and I admire him for knowing what he wanted. Still, it must have been so hard for your family.

I think of you often, wondering how you are doing and what you are thinking about next. We'll all be here when you're ready for internetting again..

Anonymous said...

oh nikki, i've been thinking about you. so sorry to hear about this stressful time for your family. i'm glad that you are okay, though.


Sarang said...

You're in my thoughts.

I'm glad you have this time with your parents near you.

I'm here for you. XOXO