Saturday, February 21, 2009

Simba

We have friends that love Simba, and very willingly baby sit him when we travel out of town. Since we were supposed to be going to Denver on Tuesday, we had spoken with them about Simba staying with them while we were out. They agreed of course, but on the condition that they get to spend at least one weekend with Simba. So we had all agreed that Simba would go to their house this weekend, and come back home after we return from Denver. Our plans got changed, but our friends had already made plans around Simba this weekend, so we agreed to have him go spend the weekend with them.

They picked him up last night, and right now, I’m missing him terribly! I woke up this morning and went downstairs and it struck me that Simba is such a huge part of this house and our family that it is impossible to imagine life without him! The house is so silent. Not that Simba is a magic dog that talks, but he communicates. He makes us talk to him. He makes us have the semblance of a normal life, the feeling that we are in fact parents. He makes me refer to DH as Dadda when I talk to him, and makes DH refer to me as Mama. “Where’s Dadda, Simba?” makes him run and look for DH.

I’ve written about Simba before, and I mention him often here on my blog. Simba came into our lives when our first IVF failed. We had a huge need to parent, and take care of a little life dependent on us, and DH thought bringing a puppy home would be just the thing for us. It was. The little ball of fur, all of 6 weeks when he came home, was a wonderful outlet to our parenting instinct and our need to nurture something.

If the last 3.5 years of parenting Simba is any projection of how we’d be as parents, then I can’t wait for us to be parents to a real human baby! DH surprises me by being so gentle and calm with Simba, and I surprise myself with being so very patient with him. He knows Dadda is the one who takes him out and makes him play fetch, but he knows that if he’s in trouble, and Dadda is angry, then Mama will take care of him. He knows that if he comes and looks at me in a certain way, I’ll know he is hungry or is thirsty.

It was a scary realization today that if we didn’t have Simba in the house, and if our lives had proceeded the same way in other aspects, ie, if we were infertile and had had those losses, and were where we are emotionally, mentally, physically, it would be a very very depressing and lonely existence. Just the 2 of us in the house to deal with all of these raw emotions would be too hard to bear. Not that Simba offers any emotional advice, but he just takes away so much pain by wagging his tail or licking the tears away!

After my ectopic pregnancy, we talked about getting another puppy – and we still might. It’s just that from then on we’ve been traveling to Denver practically every month, and we didn’t think it would be fair to bring home a new puppy and have to leave him/her in boarding or with friends so often.

All said and done, I miss the little guy! OK – he’s not little, he weighs over 90 lbs! Is it Sunday night yet? 

18 comments:

Angie said...

Ah, so sorry you are missing your puppy!!! you mentioned many of the reasons we are considering getting a dog....DH thinks it will *help* us and give us something to care for....thanks for sharing! hope he returns home soon!!! :-)

margelina said...

AWWW, (((BIG HUGS))), Nikki. I know how you feeel missing him...my little "baby dog" Lucy is my child in every way. I miss her like crazy when we go away, and she stays with my mom! The other morning was harried and crazy and I know my oldest let her out, but I couldn't remember if she was let back in. She had a recent short hair cut, and it was cold with ice and snow mix. I was about to park at the grocery store when it dawned on me and I turned around and drove hom. I knew I couldn't walk thru the store wondering. I was nearly in tears! 20 minutes later I found her inside snuggled in the laundry, but still!
I am very glad you have awesome friends who love him (and you!) so much to take care of him, too!

Sue said...

Oh I know! I am here in Denver without DH and without my puppies and on the first night I woke up and it was too quiet! No doggie snores...I actually leaned over to look at the floor where one of my dog's beds is. I miss them so much. It would drive me crazy to be in my house without my babies...they are just such a huge part of our family. Oh, and we do that "where's dadda?" and "where's mamma" thing...they run around the house looking for the other one:-)

Shelby said...

I feel the same way about my pets as you. Of course, that's why I've taken the loss of Kyra so hard. Our plan is to get a puppy/young dog if this IVF doesn't work. I totally understand the need to parent! Perhaps if you get a second, we can have some puppy play dates!

Brobe said...

I know how you feel. I grew up with dogs, and they become so much a part of our lives, being there for us all the time. Sunday is just a few hours away ;-)

Chhandita said...

I can so understand. I left three of my fur babies in Delhi when I got married I still miss them so much! I so want to get a dog, but well....

Animals are precious arent they? I prefer them over humans any day :)

Caroline said...

Hi Nikki,
Simba sounds like a beautiful dog. I hope that Sunday night comes around soon so that you can be together again. I am so excited for you that the FET is just around the corner.

Fashionably Infertile said...

I am so sorry you are are missing Simba. What a cutie!! Our furbabies are such a huge part of our lives. Sending you a big hug!

MamaSoon said...

Animals bring such joy into our lives. I am glad you have Simba.

Good luck for your FET this week. I am super excited for you guys. :-)

Sarang said...

Oh! Your Simba sounds wonderful!

strongblonde said...

:( i wish you could pet and love simba before you leave!

...but can you believe you are getting ready to go and do this??????

xoxo

Tori said...

I'm in the same boat as you Nikki! I got my dog Reagan after my 1st m/c and he is my baby! I can't imagine my life w/o him and especially since I'm on bedrest he keeps me company all day long! Hope your ET goes perfectly!

Hugs,
Tori

mlg- believe N miracles said...

AWWW.
Our furbabies are the best! I am sure Simba misses you too!

momsoon said...

Totally get it- our son, Dexter (named long before the show by the way) has, in many ways, saved G & me..he has comforted us, made us laugh, given us a reason to get up (never lets us sleep that late) and given us a sense of family...

You do get a preview into what you will be like as parents too. Last night we brushed Dex's teeth for the first time (that breath is getting brutal as he gets older!!) and it was like we were teaching our kid. We even put his toothbrush in the holder where ours are, which some of you non-dog owners prob. think is gross, leaving one empty place for our human-little-one's toothbrush someday.

Looking forward to following your progress!!!!

My Quest said...

God will show you favor because you show kindness and loveto simba you will soon experience the joy of motherhood.

bunny said...

Hi Nikki! Hope you are doing well. Writing to thank you for the soup recipe. I'm looking into getting a pressure cooker (practically the only kitchen toy I don't have) so I can do it up right. The flavors sound right up my alley and I'm always up for culinary adventures.

Hope Simba is back soon for some lovin'!

Lisa said...

N - thinking of you!!! You are so close! I cannot wait to hear your update!

I love my dogs too - don't know what I would do without them.

Clio said...

pets do become part of our lives in such an intricate way.
We also have three fur balls, but of the feline type. ;)
I can't imagine life without them. We miss them a lot when we travel too.
How nice that you realized the immense role Simna plays as part of the family.