Friday, January 23, 2009

PGD results are in

We got 4. Yes, that's right. 4!

I'm happy, relieved, excited and so thankful to God. Thanks also to all of you for your prayers and good wishes. You may never know how much your support and comments have helped me. I was losing my mind, and each one of you helped me stay together. Thank you all!

This last week has been a very very anxious week for us. DH and I have had numerous conversations, preparing ourselves for a phone call that begins with "I'm sorry". I was worried for DH because he doesn't vent out his anxiety like I do. He keeps it all bottled up, and there's a lot of anxiety in him because he feels responsible, yet helpless. He said he has been seeing the stress I've been under since the ER, and he knows that his BT, and the fact that everything boils down to numbers at the end of it is what is causing that stress to me, and he feels responsible. I was worrying for him while he was worrying for me.

We talked about closing this chapter and moving on. We talked about being strong for each other, and at the very least, resting in the knowledge that we've done all we could. We've been brave and strong, and have taken the bull by the horns for as long as we could. We also came to the agreement that we couldn't do this any longer. If we got a bad PGD result today, we would close the chapter.

We almost didn't want to answer the phone when it rang! The genetic counselor and our nurse were both on the line together. You could tell they were so excited! They said they had screamed and hugged each other in the corridors of CCRM when they got our results, causing other nurses and people to stick their heads out of their offices to see what was going on!

We have 4 normal blasts, and the grades are:
4AA
4AA
4BB
3BA

This is the best result we've had so far! I know I'm going to have a relaxed weekend now. It feels like a horrible weight has been lifted off our shoulders, and we can breathe again! Phew!

We know it's not over yet - it's FAR from over. It's not over till we get to come home with a healthy baby in our arms (or possibly it's not over till that healthy baby grows up and goes to college!). It's not over yet, but it's a bug hurdle crossed. A big big hurdle, and we're glad to have made it so far.

(Oh, I have to tell you about my dreams last night. I had 2 dreams. In the first, we were told we have 4 normal blasts, and their grades are 4DMR {Don't ask me what that means!!}. In my second dream we had 2 normal blasts that we transferred. I told the nurse and the counselor about my dream, and they told me to try and dream about being pregnant. I'm going to focus on that now!!)

42 comments:

Meinsideout said...

Yay!!!! Congratulations - what an awesome outcome.

When will you do the transfer?

Lorraine said...

Fantastic! I am just thrilled for you!

Lulu said...

Wow - those are great scores and you have enough now that you can breath and relax before the transfer. Yay! What a terrific result. Congratulations!!

Darya said...

I am soooooooooooooo happy for you!!!!! This is great news!! Now, you can finally relax for a bit.

Courtney said...

Oh Nikki!!! I'm so excited!!! I was clapping out loud at my desk when I read the news ;). I hope that you and DH go out tonight and celebrate this wonderful news. Pamper yourself (and your DH) this weekend because y'all deserve it after all of this waiting and stress. I love how the nurse and gc screamed in the hallway :).

Birdee said...

I seriously have tears Nikki, I'm so happy for your good news.
Yes there are many hurdles - but not this one anymore. I have my fingers crossed that what you transfer, you get your positive result, and that 8 1/2 months later, your bringing home baby.

Caroline said...

Nikki,
Your results bought tears to my eyes.
I am so excited and thrilled for you.
Congratulations!
I know that you still have a way to go, but this is a fantastic milestone.
Do you have any plans to celebrate?

Anonymous said...

Wooooohooooo! I am so excited for you! What great PGD results! Congratulations!

Kelly
kloc2006 webmd

DAVs said...

WOW!That's really really great. Wishing you only the best!

Jill M. said...

Wow, fantastic results!!!! Now that was worth the wait. How many are you planning to transfer? Hugs!

Mo said...

What AWESOME news! congrats!

Mo

Charlotte said...

Nikki,
That is amazing news!! I have been checking every day, even though I have been kinda absent from the blog world this week! If any news was ever worth the wait, this was it, though I wish you never had to go through that torture! Now you can breathe! Try and do something amazing for yourself in the next week or so, like a mani/pedi or a massage...you deserve it!! ((hugs))

Lisa said...

SO HAPPY for YOU!!!

Dora said...

Nikki! That's fantastic!!

So, are we both going to get pregnant next month? :-)

Miss Tori said...

I'm so happy that the results are FANTASTIC! What a relief. God does answer prayers, even if it is in his slow time.

Woohoo!

I Believe in Miracles said...

I'm super thrilled to hear this news!!! Oh this just made my day. I'm SO SO SO SO SO excited for you. 4 sounds like the perfect number to me. YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Praise God!

Linda said...

Woo-hoo! I'm so glad to hear that! And as a bonus, their qualities are fantastic!! I've been debating on whether or not to call about my 3 normals, as it seems like I've been talking to someone at CCRM every other day. lol You and DH deserve some good news! Enjoy your weekend and can't wait to hear about your FET!!! Yay you!! :)

The Vincents said...

SCREAMING!!! This news is the best part of my day! I am so glad that your wait is over, and that you can end the day jumping up and down screaming.
Right on.
Hugs and prego dream vibes coming your way,
Jackie

Josée Martens said...

Amazingly good news!!!

Anonymous said...

Nikki, what wonderful news. I'm so happy for you. Relax and take care of yourself for the transfer.

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

Congratulations! That is great news.

Anonymous said...

Finally! Way to go Nikki! May everything from here be as fantastic as this with no looking back! Wish you all the best.

HH

Anonymous said...

Nikki,

This is wonderful news! So when is the transfer and how many will you transfer? Remember, I transfered 2 blasts and got triplets! Hugs,
Tori

April said...

this is such great news. how does CCRM do it? seriously? i am so happy for you. now you can relax a little bit and know that you have some little embies to work with.

great big hugs and high fives!!

JJ said...

Nikki, congratulations, I am so pleased for you. This is fabulous result. And what's more, the grades for all 4 of them are fantastic. I can hardly wait for your transfer and beta!!!!

Anonymous said...

YAY!!

Shelby said...

So, so, so happy for you! I really can't begin to describe it. Nikki, I can't tell you how happy and relieved I was to hear this. Even in the face of some really difficult moments, I am so impressed by the hope you maintained. I just knew in my heart that this would be a great one, and it was! Your theories proved spot on. Have a lovely time this weekend and relax. You deserve it!

Anonymous said...

Woohooo... I am sooo happy for you! This is great. Congratulations!!!

Elana Kahn said...

That is A-Freaking-Mazing! I've been waiting for your results with baited breath, and I cannot even express how happy and excited I am for you. WOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Angie said...

Yay!!!! Congrats on such AWESOME results!!!!

bunny said...

Hooray, hooray, hooray!!! Enjoy your weekend!

April said...

what prenatal are you on?

Sue said...

Sooooo happy for you Nikki! Before I checked your blog I had a good feeling. Prayer really has lot of strength . So lets all keep praying for each other.

Anonymous said...

Hi Nikki,

I've read your blog and your postings on IVFC. I live in bay area too and plan to cycle @ ccrm (dr.sch) and wanted to ask you a few questions if its ok with you. I could not send you a PM as you may not be accepting them. My email is boug_robe@yahoo.com. I'd appreciate if you could let me know how I can contact you.

Thanks a lot!
Brobe

Lisa said...

Oh Nikki!!! This news brought tears to my eyes. I am so happy for you and have been praying for a miracle for you. This is the best news ever. And I know there are still many hurdles, but this is a great sign. Try to relax and regroup before your transfer and know that you have done all you can. You really are an inspiratoin. I will continue to pray for a miracle for you and a big fat BFP and happy nine months!!!

Polly Gamwich said...

YAY!! What amazing news!!

It' is far from over ... but this is a wonderful step in the right direction! I can't even believe there were FOUR! YIPPEE!!

Misty Dawn said...

YAY!!!! I'm so happy for you and your DH Nikki. Big HUGS!!!!

Can't wait for ET! Yes, focus on being PG, you have 4 healthy embies. :-P

Elle Charlie said...

So happy for you! Great news! Enjoy your celebratory trip!!!!! :)

C said...

Did hear me shout? I am reallllyyy happy for you...Next time you come to Hyd, I hope to see you with your miracle :)

Billy said...

That's great news!
Congratulations!!
(here from L&F)

Sky said...

OMG! I am sooooo happy for you! 4 perfect blasts.

EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT!

Yippeeeee! You're headed for a BFP - get ready! :)))

Anonymous said...

AHHHH!!! That's fantastic news! Wow, you just made my day! I'm so happy for you.