Thursday, January 29, 2009

What would you do?

We're back from our trip to the San Diego area, and I must say, I am SO glad we went. We really needed to de-stress, and the last 3 days have been awesome. We went with another family, and I think that was a good idea too, because we were forced to get out and be normal and not talk about our IF and IVF all the time. In fact, we didn't even talk about it once! 

We're back, and both DH and I are feeling "re-charged" and sufficiently calm to get started with FET preparations.

I started Lupron on Tuesday, and yesterday, I had to do my shot while we were driving back to the bay area. We stopped at a gas station, DH prepared the syringe, our friend was checking the air in the tires and I pulled up my t-shirt and did my shot right there in the parking lot! I was laughing with DH later at night that it's almost comical how we've come to a point where we're practically immodest about and because of our IF. I don't even blink or hesitate if I'm talking about IF - I'm not embarrassed talking about sperm, eggs, uterus or anything IF/TTC related!  

I'm still on my BCP - I take my last pill this weekend. AF should come next week, and then I start the patches. So far so good. 

We head out to Denver on 2/24, for our FET on 2/25. The date 2/24 has a huge significance in my life. My last pregnancy (the ectopic) had a due date of 2/24. It's sad that SO much time has gone past since my last pregnancy. At the same time, it feels significant that my FET is scheduled 1 day after my due date. Almost like I needed to wait till the due date to be cleansed of all the negative and hurtful emotions that I felt over the last year. 

I need to think about this upcoming FET, to think about how many blasts we're going to transfer. Here's where I need your suggestions.

These are the blasts we have (in terms of grading):
4AA
4AA
4BB
3BA

I feel we should transfer 2 blasts this time. I also think we should transfer 1 of the 4AA grade blasts, and one of the remaining 2. We thought about transferring both the 4AA grade blasts, to maximize our chances for this cycle, but we both agree that it will be better for us mentally to know we have a good quality blast as backup, in case this cycle doesn't work, or something goes wrong during the pregnancy. 

If all goes well, and we do come home with a healthy baby in say Oct/Nov, then the 2 blasts can stay frozen till we are ready for a sibling. 

What do you think? What would you do? 

(I may be thinking ahead of myself here totally - I have no idea if CCRM lets the patient have any say in how many blasts are transferred or which ones are transferred, but I want to be prepared with our decision nevertheless.)

29 comments:

DAVs said...

Having never gotten beyond a few day 3 embryos, I don't know much about blasts and quality. But I like your plan, it sounds reasonable to me.
Glad you had a getaway--we leave for ours next week!

Jill M. said...

Isn't it great when you're forced to get away from IF and then you discover how wonderful it is!!!

I would transfer one 4AA and one of the lower graded blasts. I feel that would give you 2 equal chances of success. I wouldn't want to put my best 2 in for fear of what if my lining is just not going to be receptive this particular time no matter what I put in? I also feel like this would give you 2 great chances at a baby now and a sibling later. I'm sure the doctors will encourage you to transfer both 4AAs, so be prepared for that suggestion. Can't wait to see what you decide!

Jewels said...

I would probably think the way you do, but I honestly dont know. I hope you have peace in which ever you decide.

Sky said...

The logic you're using on choosing blasts is sort of what I've considered in the past.

If you have 2 world-class blasts and 2 excellent (but not world-class) blasts, why not use one top notch and a lesser one as back up, which gives you the same high probability for success next time (for the 2nd baby) and reduces the chance of a twin (not that a twin would be bad).

It seems logical to me - but I'm not even remotely there yet. :)

Caroline said...

Hi Nikki,
I'm glad that you enjoyed your time away. It is so refreshing to get away and think about things that are not related to IF.

I think your plan of transferring one top quality embie and one lesser quality embie is smart.

Not long to go now!

Darya said...

I like your plan a lot. I think it's the best way to go. Glad you went away and feel refreshed! As hard as it can be, it's nice to get away from IF once in a while.

Fashionably Infertile said...

You have been through so much..I first want to comment on how strong you are! You are a true inspiration. I am glad you had fun on your trip. Personally my opinion would be put back all 4! Did you test these snowbabies with PGD? I hope everything goes well.

Angie said...

Welcome back! Glad to hear you had a good time and a break from all things IF-related! I think you have a good plan and reasoning to do the higher & lower grade transfer. GL in making your decision!!!

Anonymous said...

I strongly advise..transfer the best of the lot.

The logic is as follows..
The blastocysts are growing outside and they are at a risk as it is because they are not inside the uterus. So take your best shot.

Once you freeze and re thaw you lose the quality of any blastocyst what ever the grade..

Please do not worry about next time and next sibling..

Go all out for it this time.. Hope for the best.It will work out and stay calm...

love and prayers always..
shilpa and raj

Dora said...

I'm thinking similarly if my donor embryos culture to blast.

April said...

...and FET is ths day before my birthday! :) that's gotta count for something.

so glad that you had a nice break and were able to recharge.

you know what i am going to say about the transfer: wait and see what they recommend. they have high rates for a reason :)

Lisa said...

I have never gotten beyond day 3 myself - I am curious to see what CCRM says.

MamaSoon said...

I would totally go with your idea. I've heard multiple times that the best graded embryos are often the ones that are abnormal. You might get preggo with the one you think is the underdog. I would totally go with your plan. you are on your way now!!

Elana Kahn said...

I think transferring one of the 4AA blasts is a great idea. Maybe even do it with the 3BA so you know you have both a 4AA and 4BB just in case. GOOD LUCK!!!

Btw, I don't put *so* much stock in grading, because my 3-day, 5 celled grade C embie took just fine. :-)

Elana Kahn said...

P.S. To Shilpa & Raj: This is a frozen transfer, so all of these embryos are already frozen. :-)

Chhandita said...

Hey, Nikki..am glad you had a good trip. You really needed this break after the stress of last week...

If the choice was mine to make< would have done what you are planning... I was thinking about this same thing since I read your last post where you said you wanted to ask us something...so lotsa love and best wishes sweetheart.

Lorraine said...

Your plan seems so sensible - it will be interesting to find out what the clinic wants to do. I wonder how much they need to protect their success rates vs. what may be ultimately the most effective choice for you...

Glad you had a good time on your getaway! Hang onto that nice feeling for a few weeks, and I'll be so thrilled for you no matter what you transfer - it is a luxury to have the choice of 4!

Lisa said...

I wouldn't transfer more than 2, especially with cgh. I know CCRM will let you have the final say on how many to transfer, not so sure if they'll let you choose which ones though. Good luck with everything, I'm so glad that you have 4 blasts!

Misty Dawn said...

Yay! you're back! Glad you were able to de-stress before your FET.

I have no idea on the blasts....hope that someone can help you with that. What is the % that both embies survive the thaw?

Linda said...

Glad to hear that you had a nice getaway. I think you can have a choice as to how many to transfer but not on what quality to transfer. But I may be wrong. When I had my fresh transfer in July '08 (IVF/ICSI/PGD-FISH), Dr. Schoolcraft gave me the choice of transferring 2 or 3 blasts. We opted for two (5AA & 4AA). He didn't give us a choice as to what quality. But then, I didn't ask either. Whatever you choose, I hope and pray that it all works out for you and that you can go back later for a sibling!!

PS. I'm like a week ahead of you regarding the FET. :)

Miss Tori said...

Nikki,

I'd do exactly as you are thinking. I'd imagine that the final decision is up to you.

So glad you had an enjoyable downtime and are recharged!

Welcome back.

JJ said...

Welcome back, Nikki! Great that you had a good time. Weird about your 2/24 due date and the FET the next day. Btw, my EDD was the day after, on 2/25 - seems we are in tune somehow, those dates so close, at CCRM at the same time, ER on the same day........

I think your plan is really good, if Dr Sch lets you do it. I agree that it will help you both to know you have an AA left if this time doesn't work out (which it will). I'm exploding with excitement for you. It's coming up quickly!

Anonymous said...

Welcome back!
I think you should transfer one of the 4aa blasts and one of the lesser grade ones. I totally agree with you!
You know that they are normal cos of the PGD so that's not a factor. Go for it! I'm hoping for all the best results in the world for you!
Kaila

Lauren said...

When I saw the embie grades and before I even read your question, I said I'd do exactly what you're thinking of doing. Good call, and good luck!!!! :)

Sarang said...

Oh, wow, I feel so uninformed to chime in here. But I know, whatever you decide, it will be the right decision.

Shelby said...

Oh, my dear, I am so completely unqualified to answer this question, but I really like your reasoning. I think it's so fantastic that after everything, you're in the position to pick and choose. I am so happy for that!

And I'm so glad you got a chance to get outta dodge. I wish I could, but I don't have the time. Maybe I should figure out how to make some...I could use it! You're a relaxation role model!

Brobe said...

Great to know that you had a wonderful and relaxing vacation.

If I were you, I'd choose the best two as I'd like to maximize my chances now, unless the Dr/lab has some data to prove otherwise.

All the best with the decision
Brobe

bunny said...

Welcome back! I think you have a great plan- not putting all of your eggs in one basket- pardon the pun. Good luck, I'm rooting for you!

margelina said...

So glad you were able to get away on vacation and relax and takje a break from everything!
It sounds like you have made an incredibly solid choice here. Lots of hope and prayers for this cycle for you!! It's coming up so fast!!